Sometimes those you love, they don’t clap when you win

Look at you! You are creating things. You have started your own business. You are creating your own app. You have started writing a book. You started blogging.

Like you are doing some cool ass shit. Fabulous!

And you want your friends to clap every time you win. You expect them to be supportive, engaged, etc. Riiiiiiggggght.

Yeah, nah.

If it works like that for you, you my dear have some STELLAR friends. Bar None.

Most of us have friends who clap at the implementation or the launch of an idea, a business, or a creative venture and then they are ghost. And that hurts. Let’s be honest. It stings.

You may not want them to patronize your ventures, but you want them to champion you as you forge into this part of your journey. And that makes you human.

However, you have to be mature enough to understand that sometimes our friends and family don’t have the capacity to be the cheerleaders we think they should be or be the cheerleaders we have been for them.

You have to stop expecting YOU and YOUR LEVEL OF SUPPORT from other people. You will be disappointed every time.

My Father used to tell me “Don’t tell anyone what you are doing until after it is done.” It made me realize that I can go do what I want without the validation of my friends or my family. If they want to discuss it fine. If not, also fine. I did it for me.

Sometimes it is better to go do it alone because on your journey you so find support from other people. They may be other creatives. It may be people who just really enjoy your vibe and y’all are on the same frequency. You will find someone who actual values your business, idea, and creative content. Don’t look for them, just let them come.

In the meantime, you keep doing what you want to do. Seek out constructive criticism if you want to grow or get better at “your thing” and stop waiting for your friends and family to be the cheerleaders they ain’t cut out to be.

I’ve been there and that’s why a lot of time I go it alone. I have gotten just as much encouragement from strangers over Eartha Kitt’s internet that totals the combined support of my lovers, ex-husband, friends, and family combined. I stopped expecting my level of support from other people. Yet, I happily engage with those who understand my vibe.

Energy doesn’t lie.