Living with Sarcoidosis

Yes, I have Sarcoidosis. I live with it. It’s not always managed. I’m doing the best I can. And yes, mf’er it’s hard.

At this point, I’m not complaining. I am merely sharing my observation about living with Sarcoidosis.

A lot of people have Sarcoidosis. Some have been diagnosed, some have not and they are “going through it” because they have no answers and their immune system is going ape shit. It is ruining their life, their relationships, their marriages, corroding their mental health and swinging them into a very deep depression.

I consider myself lucky. My Sarcoidosis went on the attack in 2011 and after I had surgery to get some giant granulomas off my larynx and vocal cords, I was diagnosed.

I was also really lucky because some how my Sarcoidosis slipped down to my lungs and then went into remission. Honestly, the temporary remission was an act of God because my ex-husband left me shortly thereafter I was diagnosed. He left me dealing with a chronic illiness , 3 year old, finanical ruin and 2 nervous breakdowns. I don’t think I could have managed a horrible divorce and trying to manage a chronic illness in tandem.

I SURELY WOULD’VE FUCKING DIED.

Please let me be real honest about that. Stress is a HUGE TRIGGER for Sarcoidosis. It’s all about INFLAMMATION with Sarcoidosis. And as much as Black American Women / Mothers are abused by Western society, surely the stress and weathering of being a newly divorced Black American Mother with severe mental health issues would have triggered a “super flare” and my stress induced active Sarcoidosis would have destroyed me.

… but I’m here now. Yay for miracles, I’m still here damnit.

Sometime in 2017, my Sarcoidosis came back and spread. So now I manage my healed and peaceful life and my Sarcoidosis in tandem. The break was a Blessing because this whole “auto-immune / constantly inflamed state” disease is OVERWHELMING, sometimes. Okay, no most of the time.

I’m pumping my body with Azathioprine to fight the Sarcoidosis and them I’m pumping my body with all type of supplements:

Iron, Fish Oil, Biotin, B12, D3, Tumeric / Cumin, Spirulina, Alpha (something, something), Vitamin C, Probiotics, Flaxseed Oil, etc …

Every day.

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But I keep living. I have no choice. I’m a Mom. I have wonderful small mammals to love, cherish and feed. I keep trying to dig deep on optimism because my immediate family and friends are all I got and I want to be here for the long haul.

So I keep pushing.

But it is really hard and this post is just for me to do something cathartic before my CT scan today.

Thanks for reading and go out there and learn, support and help those who are suffering with Sarcoidosis.