Hair, crown, beauty, #Blackness, #Afrolicious

Let’s do some housekeeping. I am infact an #AfroliciousExpo influencer / partner. My affiliate link is listed for ticket sales. I tied in the event with this post I wanted to do about natural hair. So the sentiments about my hair are my own but I am also asking naturalistas to join me at the event.

Okay, you good? Transparency and truth is what I specialize in. Now, read on.

Natural Hair. Natural hair as it comes out of your head.Natural curls as they zig and zag. For a Black American woman, their hair is their crown. It is intrinsically linked to how they view themselves and how they consider themselves to rank in terms of beauty. There is a brutal history behind why Black American women and African women have had their natural hair rejected by white and colonized Black people and in Western society in general. Only now is Black hair being accepted, celebrated and championed to be a normal, instead of an outlier. Only now can Black women enjoy and explore how to care for their hair as it NATURALLY grows out of its head.

I am one such woman. My mother started perming my hair when I was 5yrs old. My hair was “too thick” to manage and I had a lot of it. Shortly after the perm, my hair fell out. For most of life, my Mother was at war with my hair and I was arbitrary. I kept wondering why in the whole hell can I not enjoy my hair like my white counterparts or Hispanic counterparts? Why couldn’t I just wear my thick, lush, kinky, curly, gorgeous hair as it grows out of my head.

For years, I had to listen to men tell me that I would be prettier if I kept my hair long and straight. I even tried to model with bone straight hair and it always looked like a wig because I had to over straighten my hair with chemicals in order to keep it straight longer than 2 weeks. It was horrible.

View this post on Instagram

“We live in a youth-obsessed culture that is constantly trying to tell us that if we are not young, and we’re not glowing, and we’re not hot, that we don’t matter. I refuse to let a system or a culture or a distorted view of reality tell me that I don’t matter. I know that only by owning who and what you are can you start to step into the fullness of life. Every year should be teaching us all something valuable. Whether you get the lesson is really up to you.” Oprah Winfrey, in “O, the Oprah Magazine” 2011 . . . This year I turned 46 years old. I am the same age my mother was when she died. I don't feel old, but I am really wise. I don't indulge in making the same pathetic mistakes I have made in the decades before my 40s. I am easily impressed by simple things like peace, kindness, generosity, laughter and innovative thinking. I look back at my youth as the warm-up. I was dynamic, sexy, strong, fearless, sometimes weak, self doubtful, corny, angry, hurt, creative and raw-in-your-face-human wearing my feelings on my sleeve. Now I am all those things, but I am a Mom. I am a better friend to people I love. I am curious. I am still learning. I am constantly changing. The party never ends, the music just changes. That's life. So I live with my Sarcoidosis, I cry still because I am huge cry baby and I am really humbled I made it this far. I enjoy being this quirky Black American woman with a comical life story. My hope lies with my child, my daily hugs are expended on my kid and dogs and I like cheese and wine. I am human and enjoying every bit of my life. . . . So join me in a look back at all the different versions of a beautiful Black unicorn I used to be. . . . #MommyFab #EfabulousHB #Over40Blogger #HTXInfluencer #BlackAmericanMotherhood #SundayReflection #chicagoaninhouston #ChicagoGirl #Memories #Over40BlackAmerican #BlackMothers #AHumanAStory

A post shared by EfabulousHB [ aka #MommyFab ] (@efabuloushb) on

So after being dumped by a misogynistic, color struck Jamaican-American who hated himself just as much as he hated my dark skin and African features, I walked into the salon and said CUT ALL MY HAIR OFF AND DYE IT BLONDE, PLEASE.I felt so beautiful and FREE in my Black Womanhood after that first big chop. The blonde hair against my chocolate Black amazing skin was stunning. It is one of the many times I have felt empowered in my own Blackness and beautiful.

Needless to say, I still had tribulations because hair grows. So I had to learn about natural hair styles in an era when natural hair was deemed unprofessional, ugly, unattractive and political. Black hair is always political because people hate Black people, dark Black skin, Black hair and everything that makes us … well us.

Fast forward to 2019, I am now a Mom. I have an amazing, beautiful daughter and I’m teaching her to love, love, love her thick, lush, gorgeous curls. I’m teaching her that healthy hair is always better than long, dead hair. I’m teaching her that the way her hair grows out of her head is wonderful, normal and NATURAL. There is nothing wrong with US and we don’t have to conform to European standards of beauty, no matter how much the world damns and quantifies Black American / African beauty.

Natural Black hair.

Natural Black curls.

Simply beautiful and undoubtedly #Afrolicious…

Speaking of afros and all things natural, on June 2, 2019 I would love for you to join me at the #AfroliciousExpo to celebrate all things natural and all things hair. In fact, don’t meet me there, beat me there.

You can pick up tickets through my affiliate link

Tickets are pretty reasonable but it might cost more at the door. It’s going to be something there for everyone. So come through!

Come celebrate Black American / African / Natural Black hair…

#usnaturalgirls #afroliciousexpo #afro #redlips #shrinkage #natural #frogang #teamnatural #curlyhair #texture #hair #naturalista #beautiful #blackness #curly #mommyfab #efabuoushb #over40blogger #blackamerican #blackamericanmothers #motherhood #womanhood #chicagogirl #blackgirlmagic #fabworld

5 thoughts on “Hair, crown, beauty, #Blackness, #Afrolicious

  1. Sharlotte says:

    I understand getting a perm at am early age. I went natural well before it became popular and am now enjoying locs!


    • efabuloushb says:

      I wanted locs about 10 years ago. Right now I seem to be riding out life with this mohawk, but the Houston heat is sooooooooooooo oppressive that I’m looking for a new natural style and I no longer think I can go back to having hair on the side of my head. #PeanutheadProblems


  2. efabuloushb says:

    “So many times I was told that for Black women, our hair is our crown” … yet because of the supremacist ideals imposed upon us it has been a long arduous road to love our hair.


  3. Kyra says:

    If I didnt have alopecia I would get locs. My struggle now goes to how to wear my hair as I begin to go bald.


    • efabuloushb says:

      I think we as Black women need to talk about alopecia more. It is my idea that if we talked about it without judgement and examined all the data / science of the disease there would be better suited solutions for those who live with this challenge.


Comments are closed.