It hurt so much. Seeing that baby seat there opened up wounds that I thought healed. That was her car seat that I brought her home from the hospital on that wonderful first day home. That was her car seat as I dropped her off at daycare. That was also the car seat that held all my tears every morning I used to cry in the back seat of our truck because I knew I wasn’t enough for my husband and having his child couldn’t hold us together. That was the car seat. Her baby seat. Now, I was giving it away to someone in need. >>> A woman posted on Facebook that a young lady had lost her job, was evicted from her apartment and went into labor. I knew then… I had to give it away. As I was Blessed as a new mother, I had to Bless someone else. >>> So with tears streaming down my face, I climbed those attic stairs and pulled down the baby seat and stroller. My heart burst into 3 full slabs and as I exhaled it shattered into pieces all over again. I starred blankly at the wood beams in the attic and I thought back to when the house was being framed. I had hoped to give him a little boy and a little girl. I had dreamed of us growing old and planting a garden. I had hoped that if I gave it everything I had inspite of all the pain, hurt and isolation I felt… I would be enough. Now 8 years later, in this house stood me, our daughter and my dogs. All of my dreams dissipated and now I parted ways with the child seat. >>>> Seemingly, I parted ways with the mixed memories associated with gaining a child and losing the greatest love of my life. >>> Life never turns out how we picture it, there is always a PLOT TWIST. #MommyFab #EfabulousHB #Baby #FailedMarriage #Memories #MixedMemories #BeingHuman #BrokenHeart #LettingGo #RealLIFE #FabWorld #Humanity #PlotTwist http://ift.tt/1JvU8Xz